Crocodile tears

November 7, 2008, 1:36 pm

it sounds overly dramatic that some mean remarks from a patient could move me to tears, but i was tired and that was my excuse.

the only thing was, i was too proud to cry in front of my fellow nurses, so i waited till it was my break, at 4 AM, an hour and a half after i was called “Nasty May”. i covered my face with the bath blanket, wiped the first drops of tear, when all of a sudden, the door opened and i had to stop being a baby. i left the doctor’s conference room to give way to a doctor who wanted to do something there. i swallowed hard, aware that crying was not an option, and in this particular case, pointless.

sometimes, i feel like everything is just so pointless.

i never wore a mask to clean smelly patients because i always had that picture of my mom when she had a necrotic wound on her toe and she was deeply hurt by a student nurse’s reaction of gagging at the smell of her wound. when she was crying in humiliation and self pity in that hospital room many years ago, i vowed i will never wear a mask except for isolated cases that require a mask for protection.

so, there he was, the whole 642 pounds of him, clean but with this distinct unbearable smell caused by trapped sweat between his skin folds. if i had any emotional reaction to the whole thing, it was defintely the feeling of sadness. i mean, it was a simple placement of condom catheter, but it took me a while to do it. he had to catch his breath while lifting his lower belly which was covering his penis. someone else had to push around his penis, while i gently pull it out for the procedure.

when it came off for the second time, he called me and said “i want my catheter replaced, and i want somebody who knows how to do it, not you.” i clarified his request just to make sure i heard him correctly, he said “yes, i want somebody else to do it, because obviously you don’t know how to do it correctly, and i don’t want to end up soaked in my own urine just because this catheter is out.” i said okay, told the charge nurse, and asked somebody else to fix the catheter.

“and that Nasty May, i don’t want to see her face again, and i don’t want her in my room again!” why he said this to the charge nurse, i have no idea. but when after all the commotion ended with the nursing supervisor in his room, he said that when i was placing the catheter, the patient care assistant and i were laughing, with shameless disregard to his dignity, and we had the audacity to continue laughing even when he told us “stop laughing, this is not funny!”

this was all a complete lie. the truth was, just like him, i found the whole situation heartbreaking. second of all, even if there was a remote possiblity i wanted to laugh, it was physically impossible for me to do so because i have been struggling with my breathing the whole 45 minutes i was in his room. my “no mask vow” worked against me, but i was determined not to break it, even if i had to hold my breath most of the times.

sometimes, i feel like it is not worth it. why bother being sensitive to patients’ needs when all they care about is trying to prove that they are being abused and are being treated unfairly?

it was strongly recommended by the nursing supervisor that i write an event form. when i asked him what event i should write about, i wasn’t being sarcastic. he said i have to give my side of the story and let the investigators know that i wasn’t laughing. i asked him, “you mean i’m supposed to write about an incident that never was?” he said yes.

“i wasn’t laughing when i placed the catheter” the thought of writing that was extremely absurd, so i didn’t. i stated the facts, and just hoped that whoever they are that will look into this case will see that i have not done anything wrong to this patient.

what killed me was his refusal to have me as his nurse anymore. after all the hours i spent in trying to make him feel comfortable, with no gratitude and appreciation, i never thought of refusing him on my next shift, because i felt it wasn’t fair. to him, to the other staff. he later retracted his request and said, “i want May back”, but frankly, the damage has been done.

but who says things should be fair? the more i think about it, the more i realize this whole experience was stupid, and it will be a waste of my time to cry.

believe me, sometimes, crying is overrated

(The story was copy pasted from http://www.aboutanurse.com)

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Crocodile tears?? air mata buaya? maksud loee?

C’mon, kita sedang berbicara mengenai air mata yang mengalir justru karena orang salah memahami tindakan kita. salah persepsi. salah mengerti.

Punya pengalaman dengan ‘air mata buaya’ anda sendiri?

The Worst Bone to Break

I see lots of broken stuff.  Noses, hips, fingers, toes, wrists, ankles, necks: all of which suck in their own unique way.  Still, when it comes to flat-out squirm factor nothing tops the broken penis.

Just getting the story is awkward.  I put up the professional facade, pretend it’s business as usual, but there’s no getting around the uncomfortableness that hangs over the room for both me and this poor unfortunate dood.  ”So the two of you were having intercourse?  And she was on top of you…no…oh ok missionary style.  And you’re saying you came out, missed on the way back in, bumped up against her and felt a pop?”

Gah!  Enough talking, although pulling back the sheet isn’t any better as I see what appears to be a giant eggplant sitting between his legs.  ”Holy bejeezus!!” I think.  ”Well that appears to be a bit swollen doesn’t it?” I say.

There’s no actual penis bone to break, instead an erect penis has a markedly thinned and relatively unelastic tunica albuginea.  With enough force this tears resulting in damage to the underlying corpus cavernosum, aka a penile fracture.  The treatment is a trip to the OR, and off he went to have the underlying blood clot evacuated and tear sewn back together.

Pretty big mood killer, to say the least.

(Cerita diambil dari blog seorang ER Doc)

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Hmmm, pengalaman yang aneh (tapi seru), hehehe.

Punya pengalaman anda sendiri?

Nurse Annoyed at Being Told “You’re Smart Enough to Be a Doctor”

by Brian Carty, MD, MSPH
10-22-2008

In a new book of essays by nurses, “Reflections on Doctors” (2008), nineteen essays show physicians as the corrupt, dishonest, homicidal misfits that they really are. Not really; that’s a spoof. The essays are intelligent and well written, but do address some important issues.

Doctor-Nurse Relationship is Like a Marriage

The doctor-nurse relationship is in many ways a marriage writ large, with love, hate, mutual dependence, ambivalence, and uncertainties about power and responsibility. As in many marriages, though, the two parties would sometimes like to take separate vacations and have separate checking accounts.

“Smart Enough Not to Be a Doctor”

One essay is titled “Smart Enough Not to Be a Doctor.” The author, Pamela Gonzalez, RN, says that she has been told repeatedly throughout her career that she is “smart enough to be a doctor.” She considers this an insult.

Are Doctors Smarter Than Nurses?

Ms. Gonzalez complains that “This backward compliment suggests that choosing a professional path in the nursing field is for those with less intellectual abilities (sic) than those who choose to go to medical school.” Ms. Gonzalez says that she wants to reply “Yes. I was smart enough – and I chose not to be a doctor.”

Ms. Gonzalez graduated from an Ivy League college and had good grades and test scores. She writes well and sounds like a very competent professional. All of which suggest that she probably would have done well in medicine.

Some Aspects of Nursing Are More Appealing

So why didn’t she go to medical school? Ms. Gonzalez gives some supposed advantages of being a nurse rather than a doctor, such as being more directly involved with patients. She believes that patients will confide sensitive information to a nurse which they won’t disclose to a physician. Still, it’s hard to imagine a relationship which requires more trust and disclosure than the doctor-patient relationship, so these arguments aren’t very convincing. There may have been other reasons why she preferred nursing to medicine.

In Some Ways Medicine Is Not So Appealing

According to Ms. Gonzalez, becoming a doctor requires spending years training before seeing patients, and HMOs often control the time physicians spend with patients. Also, she wisely does not place much value on a high income. These reasons seem a little closer to the mark. I suspect, but cannot prove, that the reason Ms. Gonzalez didn’t go into medicine was the often extreme demands placed on physicians.

Besides, what’s wrong with being a nurse? Ms. Gonzalez must know that many physicians are unhappy with their pay and working conditions. Whether medicine is still a wise career choice is a complicated issue which cannot be discussed here. Ms. Gonzalez says she was “smart enough not to be a doctor.” Perhaps many doctors now practicing wish they had been that smart.

There Is Something to Be Said for a Job Which Doesn’t Consume Your Life

My father was an engineer. No weekend call, no 3 AM phone calls, no 80 hour work weeks. He didn’t have the status, income, or maybe even the job satisfaction of a physician, but he went home every day at 5 o’clock, and then his time was his own. I think there’s a lot to be said for that.

(Source : http://hotmedicalnews.com)

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One essay is titled “Smart Enough Not to Be a Doctor.” The author, Pamela Gonzalez, RN, says that she has been told repeatedly throughout her career that she is “smart enough to be a doctor.” She considers this an insult.

Hmm, beritanya masih hot tuhhh alias masih baru, hangat. bukunya aja keluaran tahun 2008.

Punya refleksi pribadi pengalaman anda dengan dokter?

Monggo diceritakan